« My afternoon with Betty Dodson | Main | Missing you »
Indiscreet
November 07, 2006
I have a new roommate moving in tomorrow, and he knows What I Do, so whatever, I’m not totally scrambling to clean up my act, but the fact remains that my apartment is brimming over with sexual encoutrements.
Its a little ridiculous. Since I started reviewing sex toys for Fleshbot’s Marital Aid Test Kitchen every week, weird things have been arriving in the mail. Weird things in large boxes that I have to go stand in line at the post office for an hour or more to retrieve.
The week before Halloween my supplier of dirty fun, Eros Boutique, sent me a big motherfucking box of slutty Halloween costumes. Its a good thing that I have a lot of friends who are strippers and who were working on Halloween, so I was able to disperse these things easily enough. The rest won’t go to waste, though, I can always use a good slutty bunny outfit. Its amusing to me that when I was a goth teenager I looked forward to Halloween so I could stock up on a year’s worth of makeup. Now as a sex working adult, I look forward to the restocking my slutty attire. Because, as the Ministry song goes, every day is Halloween.
Anyway. I still have a large box of slutty costumes in my living room, not to mention my trunk full of lingerie, various ludicrous shoes, stacks of porno and storage containers full of sex toys. I suspect my new roomie (who I met last winter at Tristan’s party for House of Ass) will be down, but we’ll see. The problem, essentially, is that I couldn’t entirely clean up my act if I wanted to, because I am so used to living around this stuff that before my parents come to see me, they often remind me to put away my porn.
Anyway, back to writing. I have more intense things to say about my writing and researching processes, but right now I’m content to think about where the fuck I’m going to put all theses costumes and dildos.
Posted by Dacia at November 7, 2006 03:55 PM
Comments
I keep saying…we should have a sex toy swap party.
Posted by: Viviane at November 7, 2006 04:56 PM
It’s okay sweetie. I think between the two of us we can find plenty of places to hide your ‘encoutrements’. We just won’t be able to go through any metal detectors for a while.
And there’s always room in my crawl space, just in case the roommate doesn’t work out ;)
Maybe you should open a ‘Gently Used’ Toy Store? You could make it a drive through— with a speaker box? ‘I’ll take two double dildos and a side of lube. Hold the relish.’
Posted by: Desire X at November 7, 2006 06:03 PM
i completely understand! i don’t have a roommate at the moment, and when i had houseguests last week i realised i had to hide a few things before i could let them in. (My dear friend wouldn’t have minded or been surprised—her husband though would have been!)
The problem, essentially, is that I couldn’t entirely clean up my act if I wanted to, because I am so used to living around this stuff that before my parents come to see me, they often remind me to put away my porn.
this cracked me up. ;)
Posted by: O at November 7, 2006 08:56 PM
Usually I notice when things are laying around, but sometimes I REALLY don’t. Like when I had two girl friends over for dinner last week. I had somehow left a big purple silicone cock standing proudly upright on the edge of the bathroom sink. The more liberal of the two ladies had seen it before and didn’t even mention it, but the other one? The one I expected to freak out? She didn’t even NOTICE it. I asked her and she responded with a “Whaaaaaa?” I think it was just so outside of what she expected to see that she simply didn’t see it. -shrug-
Posted by: Lioness at November 7, 2006 11:15 PM
