Sex ed for boys

Here Here for that!

And the first thing that needs to be discussed is why men/boys feel ashamed or embarrased if they do not know the “answers” beofre other boys their age. Its a problem with many teens, they would love to have a legitimate conversation about their sexual nature, but will get beat down by their peers or something of the like. I used to work with kids/young adults at risk, this is a huge problem for most kids, it is the central issue that causes other problems in their lives. Imagine being a 14 year old black homosexual in a rural country town! A minority in a minority. My kid was always in fights. He is a normal kid, but because of his sexual nature no one wanted to talk to him about how he was feeling or anything he was feeling sexually. I worked with that kid for 9 months and only at the very end of our time together was he able to trust me enough to come off with some off his emotions. I have no answers really, its just a nerve you hit. I lived abroad for a year, in germany. I was 19 and knew nothing of the world, culturally speaking. Living amongst the germans, i gained more knowledge about culture than any point in my life in the states. I attribute this to the aspect that europeans have better ways of transfering their knowledge of culture to the next generation. I do know this, my german girlfriend was leap years ahead of me in manners, communication, rationalization, and responsibility. anywho, just ranting here…….

“However, the other side to all that is that men also need education and support in discovering their sexualities and finding healthy, respectful practices that they enjoy.”

Thank you, Dacia.

“Although it can be well-argued that the majority of societies across the globe are male-dominated and built around the needs and desires of men, positive representations of male sexuality are sorely lacking. Though men are everywhere, there aren’t really spaces for men to talk and think about sexuality”

Thank you, thank you, thank you.

The assumptions that men are simple creatures who’s sexuality can be managed instrumentally (viagra for flacidity, squeezing the base or maybe dapoxetine for prematurity, maybe saltpeter to bottle it back up again, Chesty Canyon or Peter North videos to keep him from worrying the sheep) are problematic on two fronts. First, they support a neglectful waste of human potential. Worse, they create an environment where boys grow up believing it themselves. Lacking authority (in the sense of authorship) of their own sexuality there’s a tendency to give up and exert power (in the sense of taking or consuming rather than creating) instead. Much hilarity does not ensue.

Thank you so much for looking this way. I’m so sorry you cross the Atlantic to find people doing it. I hope you can bring it back with you. It’s important, not just for the boys themselves but for the men they will become and for the women and other men who will become their partners.

figleaf

I agree as well. We can’t have healthy, intelligent, happy sex lives if both genders aren’t being educated. (Ok, maybe it’s not so key if you’re a lesbian. :-)

I’ve often thought that boys/men need to be included in feminism as well. If we truly want equality and mutual respect we both need to be working towards it. I got the new issue of Bitch magazine yesterday and it’s interesting how at least one person was antagonistic about a feminist magazine (Bitch) having an issue with a masculinity theme (their last issue). But the fact is femininity and masculinity don’t exist in a bubble, nor do they exclusively exist in people of the corresponding gender.

As femme as I am, I have a butch side that occasionally needs to be catered to. grin

Peopleism anyone?

Thank you, Dacia, for some great insights.

Though I’m not commenting on everything you said, I agree with it all.

Guys’ sexuality is a real mess, when it comes to it. And in this male-dominated world, it may never matter how much other sex education is done, if the dominant ones are left alone.

People just think we straight guys get hard, stick it somewhere, and that’s the end of the day. The more people get away from that, the better off we all are.

What a brilliant post. I am seriously speechless. Nadia, you have probably hit on a very sore spot that may not be resolved during my lifetime. There does need to be a peopleism, women and men need to reclaim each other instead of belonging to seemingly armed camps that occassionally join for reproduction, then go back to the “old” ways. Please start it Nadia.

Thank you,

Monty