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Self and non-self
July 28, 2004
So to put my best foot forward with trying to explain who I am, I’ll rely on some trusty identity shorthand and then expand from there.
I’m a grrl, bisexual, polyamorous, a slut, pervert and nerd.
And now, to put that liberal arts education to work, I’ll deconstruct this a little. Ah, the semantics of identity: -Grrl: Calling myself a woman still feels wrong (at 24) , girl sounds too diminiutive. Though I missed the heighth of the riot grrl movement by a few years, as a teenager I was inspired by Bikini Kill and Babes in Toyland, so the grrl is always in there. And out and about, with the prowling. -Bisexual: this one is always problematic. I like boys and grrls - but I also appreciate the genderqueer, transfolk and others who slip between the cracks (or go there kicking and screaming). I use “bisexual” because unlike “queer” it is more clear about the fact that I like (love, really) biological men. I’ve debated using something like “multisexual” or “pansexual” - and the words I prefer are always subject to change. -Polyamorous: in the past two years, I’ve come to the realization that while I am capable of monogamy, I prefer to make my life more complicated than that. I’ve experimented with the open relationship thing - and the truth is that I just don’t know what I want. I like being a slut, but I’m just not sure if I should have a primary partner and be a slut or if I should juggle more than one serious relationship (and also still be a slut). -Slut: I love this word. To me, its means that I like fucking unapologetically and safely. It means that I’m aware of myself and that I know (most of the time) what I want. It means that I have fantasies, but I like to take action on them as soon as I can manage it. -Pervert: This fits in nearby the whole slut thing. I think about sex a lot - sometimes in a very civilized manner, but often in its baser forms. I have dirty thoughts, I jerk off to dirty movies, I like it dirty. And I think that being a pervert can be a good thing. -Nerd: I overanalyze things, love research and want to know a lot of stuff - about sexuality in the cultural sense, about my sexuality, and about my partners. Its incurable, but mostly lovely.
Posted by Dacia at July 28, 2004 11:58 PM
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Comments
u’re gonna be dangerous in your late thirties with a libido this size already… hehe…
Posted by: Nik at July 19, 2005 11:38 AM
