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The value of things
April 01, 2005
Recently I’ve been thinking about money a lot, specifically what things in my life I’ll do for money, what I’ll do for love, and how/when to combine the two. Yesterday I was asked the innocuous question “what do you do for fun?” - I drew a bit of a blank. The honest answer is sleep, masturbate, fuck, and lay in bed eating chocolate cake and watching movies with Jane. The more expansive answer is that I’ve set out to make everything I do in my life some degree of fun.
One of the major elements of happiness for me has to do with nakedness. Today one of my friends asked what I’ve been up to this week, and I realized in the telling that mostly what I’ve been up to is being naked, and getting dressed to go be naked somewhere else. I get naked for a bunch of reasons - for money, for relaxation, for fucking, for art, for smut and for dancing around my apartment to the Ramones. All damned important in my mind.
As I’ve mentioned before, I’m not what you would call a cutthroat capitalist. What this boils down to is that in the land of getting naked in front of a camera, I’ve been doing a lot of TFP (time for prints) work, which basically translates to getting naked for free for near strangers and then getting cool sets of photos to use for whatever purpose I deem appropriate. So I’ve been pondering whether I should get more intense about being paid for modeling work - and the answer is yes and no. I’ve started to build a pretty awesome portfolio (which you all will be seeing soon, I promise), so the TFP work has been good for that, but also I love the collaborative effort I’ve started to get going with the photographers I’ve been working with. In some ways, adding money to the equation seems to cheapen that - generally only the older and more established photographers can pay, and I really love working with young, cool, edgy artists with cool ideas and good senses of humor. My body is a commodity - one that I chose to share, rent out, etc at my will.
But in a life where I’m genuinely interested in making all my work fun - will all my fun end up turning into work? For instance, I refuse to get a webcam, because first of all I already spend enough damn time in front of my computer, and second of all I’d feel awful about camming for free and I don’t really want to make camming yet another sex business venture. It’s good to love what I do, but I don’t need to market every waking, titty-shaking moment of my life.
Posted by Dacia at April 1, 2005 11:46 PM
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